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2 月 5th, 2010
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I can’t remember the film, but I’d seen an broken-down movie once about a screenwriter who was complaining about the contrivance the studio treated his limited script about kids playing ball in the park. Once it was written and sold, the share was later turned into a war film, ruing any care, attention or precise labor that the writer had set into an otherwise fetching account. To say that this is what could have happened to the Incredible Four is objective an assumption. But, somewhere along the line, between writing the script and casting the film, somebody who didn’t know a damn thing about Marvel’s finest hero group took control and warped it into one of the stupidest pieces of cinema this side of SuperGirl. Either they didn’t know or they didn’t care. Capture your retract.
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When I heard who was cast as Ben Grimm, the Thing, I was really furious. I had never even once understanding of Michael Chiklis, but there could not have been anyone better for the role. Hyped up, I learned about who would pick the role of the Human Torch. Whatever, I’d never even heard of this kid. Then, Jessica Alba, and I said, “Oh no.” Not as the….Invisible Woman??? How can it be worse!?! Then, it got worse with some guy who’s name I couldn’t even squawk as Mr. Extraordinary, with gray dye on his temples. Not even looking anywhere arrive the accurate age of Reed Richards, this guy meant doom. But not all by himself. No, the staunch doom would approach from the smug actor, Something Whatisname, who would extinguish the character of Dr. Doom forever. Not only did this guy discover like he couldn’t play Doom but he played him in a really tiresome location design. Here…
Reed and his ilk want to go out into status for a science mission. I halfway believed him as a sparkling guy, but never are we made to gain that he is a genius. Victor Von Doom is the billionaire who finances the project and tags along – with Sue Storm as his girlfriend (!) and Johnny and Ben to mark along as pilots. Now, what is contaminated with this chronicle?
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FIRST: Reed and Doom were friends in college until Doom blew up his fill face in a science mistake and blamed it on Reed, hating him forever. This was waaaaay before Reed even knew the Storms.
SECOND: Johnny Storm was mighty younger in the comical book, at least by three or four years. AT LEAST. How he unbelievably managed to catch the inch into position at that age, I will never know, so it’s helpful that they fixed that allotment.
THIRD: I don’t believe Sue was a scientist in the book – in fact, I’m obvious of it. Either plot, Jessica Alba, being a major hottie, gets away with her hotness when being in ANY movie. But she will never derive away with playing a scientist.
FOURTH: Doom never went into site with Reed and his ilk and he clear as heck wasn’t dating Sue.
FIFTH: Ben Grimm ROCKS! Can’t diss that fraction.
So, there. Before the film even starts, not only do they manage to smartly fabricate a timely legend about their origin which manages to incorporate Doom, but they DO IT BADLY AND STUPIDLY! Trying to crunch in the necessary themes was a friendly understanding but it was left in the hands of unpleasant, poor, unpleasant storytellers. Doom ends up getting zapped in plot with the rest of them and that’s why he has armor? BECAUSE IT’S HIS SKIN? LAME!!!!
I won’t go into noteworthy more of my personal hatreds, but I will speak you that I abominate the director, Tim Fable of “Barbershop” fame. Not only is he not competent enough to grasp on a memoir like this one, but he doesn’t know enough about it to care. With a name like his, I half expected at least a obliging visual “account.” Instead, we seemed to collect fair a pile of smoking junk, as if he didn’t know a apt memoir if it bit him in the butt. Now, some directors honest do what they do because it’s payday or because they don’t have the clout to flex any muscles. If he were Spielberg, he would probably have said, “NO! Capture THIS GARBAGE Attend AND LET WHEN KNOW WHEN YOU HIRE SOME Dependable SCREENWRITERS!” (this from the guy who made “Jurassic Park” – which only floated thanks to CGI. But CLOUT reigns supreme) But, Yarn is not Spielberg, he’s the guy from “Barbershop.” But the film unbiased reeks of not even trying. If he was powerless and had to succumb to the studio’s demands, I assume it all wait on. The studio should have backed off, not him.
Ben’s latext skin was reliable, but it really should have been better with a itsy-bitsy CGI touch-ups. There were times when I cringed at how obviously untrue his orange suit was. Calm, Chiklis handled the job really well, but the scene where Ben’s wife leaves him was totally amusing. Unexcited, not his fault. Furthermore, not that I’m hating, but I could have sworn that Ben’s blind girlfriend in the humorous book was white.
Sue Storm and Reed Richards sucked almost as dreadful as Doctor Doom. Doom is a super-intimidating figure and it did not play out here well enough. He said some mean things, smacked some people around, but he was by no means the insane mastermind from paper pictures. Sue’s powers looked super-cool but Reed’s seemed a bit amusing at times. But during the Mammoth FIGHT SCENE, I forgave a lot and honest enjoyed myself. For a few minutes there, it was totally Improbable FOUR material.
The Human Torch could not have been better. Not how I imagined him, but he surpassed all my expectations and actually proved me rotten in some places. He is cocky and arrogant and, like Paddle from THE INCREDIBLES, seemed to be the only one to luxuriate in the opinion of having well-kept powers. Nice change of hurry, differing from Batman, Blade and Spiderman, who do what they have to do like it’s a curse or a reason to be bummed out all the time.
If I were to rate it from one to ten, I would give it a four. One because it’s a superhero movie. Two, because Alba is hot. Three, because I loved Grimm and Johnny and their constant bickering. And four, because some of the effects, like the Human Torch’s fire, were top notch. Hold one thing in mind though, after the “Incredibles” came out and everyone saw how frosty a person with stretch powers could be, rumor has it that the Incredible FOUR went abet and shot “better” scenes of Reed stretching around. Peaceful….no competition. Not even enough competition for a cartoon.
I’ll be unprejudiced…this movie doesn’t need an “extended carve” version…certain it’s a stunning movie, but most of you already have an acceptable version of it, and an extra 20 minutes of footage is elegant, but to most of us, not quite enough to define buying an entire other DVD version of it…
So WHY am I reviewing this version of the DVD as a 5-star “MUST Take” version? SOLELY because the “extras” DVD has a feature reflecting and honoring JACK “KING” KIRBY, the man/legend who co-created the entire Marvel universe (among other superheroes), with Stan Lee, but got almost NONE of the credit (or money) that Stan did…
KIRBY was a creative FORCE for both Marvel and DC comics over his lifetime career, and not only was he the world’s greatest laughable book creator and artist, but an amazingly warm, improbable person, family man, and treated his fans as if they were cessation friends…never in the world was a man more deserving of a documentary than Kirby was, and while it should’ve been included in the fresh release, this feature alone is WELL worth watching and well worth as well the cost of buying this DVD…you will NOT be disappointed by watching the KIRBY documentary…he WELL deserves this honor, and it’s VERY enthralling for comical fans and non humorous fans alike…
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